WHEN TRAVEL GOES WRONG: Best Funny & Humorous Travel Stories

October 18, 2018

Contents – Open To Read

DO YOU WANT TO READ SOME AWESOME FUNNY TRAVEL STORIES? 

Then, my friend, you are in the right place because not only you’ll read some truly funny stories here, but I am actually The REAL MASTER OF DISASTER! They should give me an Oscar for  “Best Funny travel story” category. Yes, I’m that bad! 

 

But as someone wise once said:

 

“The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.” 

  Mark Twain

 

A  good funny travel story is usually the result of something that has gone (terribly)wrong. So there shouldn’t be anything to laugh about right? Except for the fact that you not only survived the accident but now you’re actually secretly proud to tell your friends all about your funny story over and over. I know I’m right…Confess! ?

Those “Huh oh” moments can be quite unpleasant experiences, but you instantly know that they will make to the collection of excellent and interesting humorous stories for years to come! Heck, you might even score a date or two if you find an ironic person (Just saying!)

 

I love funny travel stories so much! They show the less glamorous part of traveling and are an important part of travel itself. They represent the challenge, the adventure, the thrill. The real deal, not those perfect Instagram shots we ALL know are staged. DUH!

 

 

Basically, everything a real traveler is looking for when venturing outside his/her comfort zone. And as already mentioned I know a thing or two about it. So much so that after 8 years of adventures, my friends are literally begging me to write a book with a collection of the best funny stories I have!

So to quiet them down a bit I started to write a few humorous stories on FB and now I’m trying to collect them all and transfer my funny moments (disasters) while traveling in here too. 

I just added the infamous one I had this year (2019 as we speak) when I first arrived in Australia for the first time ?

 

 

 



But back to this article: I had a mission!

 

To search and collect all the funny or at least humorous stories related to travel around the web and put them together in a top ten post, easy right? Not quite!

 

To reach my goal I started extensive researches on blogs and various websites. I even searched the most remote pages of Google to spot them and it wasn’t as easy as I thought!

 

But, at least, what I found and selected in the end, is definitely worth reading! Someof the ones I’ve discovered are incredibly funny and humorous stories, others are creepy or beautifully written, whilst some others are quite spicy (stay away if you are a prude).

 

No matter how different they are, they all have one thing in common: They made me laugh or chuckle a bit. And in any case, if something goes REALLY WRONG, there are legal ways and consultancies services you can count on (which is a release! phewwww).

 

BEFORE GETTING TO THE FUN STUFF, A SERIOUS NOTE:

 

As a Master of Disaster other than the funny ones, I have so many horror stories to tell! I got injured and sick during my trips and they stole my possessions during a bus ride in Thailand once (including 1000 euros cash).

 

So a word of advice is in order: be extra careful when you choose the travel insurance for your trip! (Click here to see what I use , they literally saved my life and finances more than once).

 

I never go without it and even if in some of these funny stories it might not be necessary, trust me that in other cases… it most certainly is!



SO BACK TO THE FUNNY STORIES FINALLY!

Yeah, that would be me, with a whole tomato in my mouth in a pub in Amsterdam. WHY? There is no why, I simply like being silly ?

 

For each story, I will insert a quick excerpt to give you a glimpse of what the fuss is all about, and I’ll put the relevant link to the article if you want to read the filthy details ?

 

BONUS MATERIAL:

Scroll till the end to find an article that seriously cracked me up! It’s not technically a story, but it’s definitely travel related!


 

1| 24 HOURS TO GET TO MELBOURNE (AND ALMOST SLEEP UNDER A BRIDGE)

 

Category: Funny Stories

“I had dreamed of that moment for hours… That fantastic moment where I was given the key to my room and I would have seen the most precious thing in the world: A BED. What I see instead is a sofa in the living room of an unknown house, located in between the entrance door and the kitchen door. I swear I was about to faint. “

 

This is a new series of my blog. Given that my friends and followers on Fb love the live chronicles of my horror-funny travel stories I decided to start posting them here.

In this occasion… well, this is how the land of Kangaroos welcomed me on my first night Down Undernight, after 24 hours in the air, lost in space-time and angry like a stray cat ?

Source Keep Calm And Travel: Humorous Stories turned into horror ones: Me, David & The Taxi Driver

 


1| ALMOST KILLED BY A TURKISH HAIRDRESSER IN GERMANY

 

Category: funny stories

“The hairdresser proceeded to shave around the perimeter of my hairline, focusing mostly on the back of my neck. He moved the razor in quick little strokes, handling its edge with feline grace. I made the mistake of picturing how easily he could take my eye out, or how quickly he might give me a Sweeney Todd, and it was then my complexion faded from ‘Eggshell Uncomfortable’ to ‘Chartreuse Sputum.’”

This is an absolutely brilliant story, reporting how a simple question about politics can change the course of a simple hair cut from magic to tragic.

Will our hero succumb under the claws of the Turkish hairdresser?

SOURCE: Oh God My Wife is German


 

2 |THE MYSTERIOUS EUROPEAN SHOWER 

 

Category: Humorous Stories

“There were no knobs or handles of any kind that I could turn to get the water running. There was this little console inside, which I tried to use. At first, it seemed self-explanatory. It had dials for water temperature and water pressure, and a start/stop button! Plus, it was all in English! Surely I could figure this out, right?”

 

The mysterious shower

A very Funny insight on how an innocent European shower can become a mysterious sinister object for the poor American Tourist.Will Geraldine figure out how to handle a “highly technological” European Shower? Click on the link below!

This is a must-read tale from a  super talented writer. Geraldine would be able to make you laugh even by writing on how she drinks her coffee!

Source: Everywhereist



 

 

3| CULINARY EXPERIMENTS

 

Category: Funny/Quirky stories

“While in Vang Vieng, Laos, two other travelers and I decided to visit the local market one evening. The idea was that we would each purchase some kind of food item to bring back to the guesthouse and share with the group for a nice local dinner”

 

The post I’m linking to is a collection of stories from Derek Baron. He decided to put together a list of the dumbest things he did during his 14 years of extensive traveling.

The result is a quite hilarious post where, among other funny experiences, Derek tells us how he decided to eat a Rat, in an attempt to try the local cousin. How did the experiment go? Read on to discover it!

Source: Wandering Earl


 

 

4| THAI MASSAGE OR THAI TORTURE?

 

Category: Humorous stories

Her black eyes examined me closely, wrinkles forming in her chestnut brown facial skin as she visually assessed me prior to my massage. “You big boy. I think you need two hours.” “No, I’m good with one.”

 

Would you like a massage??!

Beware of who you put your trust in. A relaxation massage turned into a Karate match against an old Thai lady. Who is going to be the winner?

Source: One dad one kid


 

 

5 |CHASED DOWN A MOUNTAIN BY SOME LOCAL WOMEN

 

Category: Humorous Stories

“Wow, these people are so friendly!” I thought to myself. This is exactly the kind of cultural encounter every traveler hopes for – walking down a mountain en route to a rural village, water buffaloes munching away on shrubs, women from a local hill tribe joining for a walk. Why this is the kind of stuff makes the feature story on the National Geographic! Right?

 

We’ve all been there: captured by the innocent smiles and kindness of the locals in a foreign land… Be careful when putting your pink glasses on, as you will also probably need a good pair of shoes to run away as fast as possible! Click below to read Audrey’s escape plan!

Source: That Backpacker


 

6 |DEATH ON THE BOAT

 

Category: Black humor / quirky Stories

“I immediately felt my chest tighten and my heart began to race as my mind replayed the events of the past few days – had I been using insect repellent? Had I been covered up? Had I been bitten? I was suddenly convinced that I was about to die too”

Lauren Smiling before the nightmare begins

What would you do if you find yourself trapped on a slow boat with a poor dead body lying next to you? This is obviously not a funny story, but a rather creepy adventure on the Mekong river. Lauren has an entire anthology of weird and funny-tragic stories on her website.

There I am, bumming at the airport before my flight and reading Lauren’s book!

A must-read! And now she has a book! Well actually I also have her book because her stories are just super fun, I totally recommend it, check it out in here!

Source: Never ending Foot Steps


 

 

7 |”MONKEY BUSINESS”. ON A CHICKEN BUS…

 

Category: Spicy Travel Stories

“As the bus ride progressed and the chicken bus going like crazy everyone sliding back and forth in every direction I noticed something weird. I kept feeling his leg purposely touching my leg so I, of course, started making my leg touch his as well”

Warning: Spicy Adventure ahead! ? Some travel bloggers are quite adventurous and brave enough to tell us all about their hot encounters…

This story is probably one of the most popular spicy tales of the past few years. No need to get embarrassed tough. I actually admire those people who can be very open about their life, and the story is pretty hilarious! want to know more? Put the kids to sleep first ?

Source: Breakaway Backpacker

 


 

8| FLATTERY GOES A LONG WAY

 

Category: Funny Stories

“Hello! You are beautiful,” he began. While my first reaction was to keep on walking, I stopped to listen anyway. Because you have to admit, the man had a valid point.

 

 

Honestly? I didn’t know which post to choose from Sally’s dozen funny stories! She just drags you into her clumsy funny world so easily!

This time, she writes about how flattery seems to be her weak point. Apparently, she can’t resist a compliment and she was convinced to join a group of Chinese tourists, that treats her like the star of the hour!

Do you want to know how she ended dressed like a local on a rice terrace? Click on the link to read about her adventure!

Source: Unbrave Girl


9| FUNNY STORIES: OUTRAGEOUS PICTURES

 

Category: Visual Funny stories

Instead, I’ve decided to share some of the more quirky, bizarre, outrageous, outlandish, humorous, funny, ridiculous, absurd & truly off-the-charts moments I’ve experienced while traveling over the years, as summarized in a photo essay.

Indian-Man-Cleaning-Genitals

In a post about funny/weird stories, I couldn’t certainly forget to add a photographic essay on some funny/irreverent pictures from around the world! Get ready to chuckle! ?

Source: Nomadic Samuel


 

10 |SPANKED AT A FISH MARKET

 

Category: Funny /spicy /Humorous stories

“It was hot. Korean summer hot. Melting makeup hot. Seriously, summer in Korea gets up into the 30s and feels like plus 40s with 100% humidity and not a drop of rain. I had undone the top of my shirt to let a little air in and I suppose I should mention my breasts”

This is a funny short travel story on how you need to be extra careful whilst traveling in a different cultural environment. Especially in terms of clothing! ?

Source: The Escapism Artist



BONUS MATERIAL:

THE MOST HILARIOUS LIST OF FLIGHT ATTENDANTS ANNOUNCEMENTS

 

1) “Flight attendant on a Virgin Australia flight “And today we have someone who is celebrating their 21st birthday, please stand up xxxxxxx……Fancy that, 21 and never been in a Virgin.”

2) “Please feel free to leave behind any of your items in the overhead compartment; I’m having a yard sale this weekend.”

3) “Hi, I’m Captain Amanda Smith. Yes, I’m a female pilot and as a benefit, if we get lost on the way I won’t be afraid to stop and ask for directions.”

4)On an early morning flight, “I noticed a few ladies who forgot to put on their makeup this morning. I’ll be dimming the lights for your convenience.”

5)“How about that landing? Not bad for his first day.”

Do you want to read more?! Check out the full article, to die for!

Flights and Frustration

So here they are, the 10 of the funniest/weirdest travel stories I found on the web and let me tell you, It’s been a real challenge to find them!

Why is that? don’t people write enough about their weird adventures? am I a bad researcher or it’s just Google trying to hide them really well??

Whatever the reason, it’s a pity because these are the kind of stories that transform the average traveler in a real Indiana Jones!



If you have a very funny or humorous Travel story to share, please leave a comment with your link or a quick recap! I’d love to discover other Crazy adventurers out there! Come out from your shell and share your stories with us! 

Cheers!

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